Now that I am riding the trainer several times a week to do my fancy altitude training, I am also using my ipod often. It hasn't been used much since my marathon in February and sadly I have not made any new play lists. I need to do that. It is essential to my training that I create a few new trainer play lists. I am finding that the songs I have are mocking me during my workouts. Let me provide you with some examples of what I am dealing with.
1) The Tragically Hip keep asking me 'are you ready, are you ready, are you ready..?'. Quit taunting me, you know the answer is a resounding NO! If I were ready I wouldn't need to be on the trainer with this mask strapped to my face, come on boys, use some common sense!
2) Freddie Mercury making comments about the size of my butt. 'fat bottomed girls you make the rockin' world go round, Get on your bikes and ride'. Dude, what the heck do you think I am doing! and no I'm not gonna take you home tonight, you just told me I had a fat ass. Plus, not too sure you liked the ladies;)
3) White Snake seems a little sympathetic to my cause. At least they tell me 'Cos I know what it means, to walk the lonely street of dreams, An' here I go again on my own, Like a drifter I was born to ride alone'. Just the fact that they keep saying, here I go again makes me think that they like to rub it in that I am once again going into oxygen deprivation.
4) Bono likes to remind me 'its a beautiful day, don't let it get away'. Hey Bono, I can see that through my window, I'll get out there as soon as this suffer fest is over.
5) Amy Winehouse tells me 'yes, I've been black but when I come back you'll know, know, know'. Is she referring to bruises on her hips from falling off her bike? Makes me think of my bruises and how at least I haven't fallen off the trainer, YET!
6) Janis Joplin actually gives me a bit of a pep talk. 'and each time I tell myself that I, well I think I've had enough, but I'm gonna show you , baby, that a woman can be tough. I want you to come on, come on, come on and take it, Take another piece of my heart now baby'. This is the point where the pep talk ends and I notice how fast my heart is beating and begin to wonder if I am missing a piece.
7) Pink shows me no respect by asking me 'So What?' when I am proud of accomplishing yet another high altitude session. I think what she is trying to say is, you have many more to go and it is nothing to celebrate until you complete the real altitude session on August 14th. Come on girlfriend, let a sista revel in the small victories!
8) Meatloaf doesn't seem to think the burn I am feeling in my legs is intense enough and knows how to remedy this 'and I wanna take you out of the frying pan, And into the fire. Out of the frying pan and into the fire'. Okay, message received load and clear, work harder, burn harder, I got it, I got it!
9) Sheryl Crow sympathizes with the cuts and abrasions on my legs from my off road adventures. She assures me that 'the first cut is the deepest, baby I know, the first cut is the deepest'. Wonder if she knows how long they should take to heal?
10) Nickelback brings my attention to the difficulty (slight understatement) I am having breathing by wondering 'would somebody help me breathe, would somebody help me breathe?'. Get over it, no one is going to help you breathe, suck in, blow out!
11) Flo Rida knows that by the end of my workout 'you spin my head right round, right round, When you go down, when you go down, down, You spin my head right round, right round'. Yup my head is spinning round alright, and that race I'm doing all this training for is 'going down, down'!
Even though these songs are razzing me during my workouts, they are providing a warped sense of motivation. I have heard these play lists so many times that they have become like a broken record that just keeps replaying over and over and over and over. I need new songs to taunt me while I experience the simulated rocky mountain high. Readers, send me your favorite songs and I will make a special Leadville play list. Please, you can see 'it finally happened, I'm going slightly mad'.